What To Do When You Are Forced To Pour From An Empty Cup

I don’t advise any woman or parent to make it a habit of being exhausted and having to “pour” from an empty cup but let’s be honest many of us do it regardless of our support. Many of us are operating on autopilot most of the time. It doesn’t necessarily mean that you are not getting enough rest at bedtime. It sometimes means that you are just overwhelmed with your daily responsibilities. When there is never a break from all of the many roles that you lead, you begin to do what we have coined as “running on empty”.  

We are constantly encouraged to take “self-care” heck I even promote that here on The Mommy 365, but let’s just be honest for a second. We sometimes don’t have time for self-care. This lack of self-care is what causes us to “run on empty” and we find ourselves “pouring” from an empty cup. Pouring from an empty cup is going, going, and going, but never having the time to refuel for the journey. It’s exhausting and can lead to depression, anxiety, stress, hate, and illness.

How do we avoid this, or better yet what do we do when there is no babysitter, help from family, or time for self. I can relate and it wore me down mentally and physically. I started doing these small but powerful things for myself and it began to make me feel like I had risen above the dark cloud of stress and depression.

Getting organized can be quite difficult, but if you can commit to two or three weekends within two or three months you can declutter and realign areas of your home that may be a little overwhelming for you to see. I guarantee you that it will save you more time to do more important things than to look for stuff.

Listen, people will run you ragged and down if you allow them to, even your children. You must set boundaries for yourself and what you can physically do in a day. We have glorified busy for too long. If God requests that we have a day of rest, well, we should listen. Begin to use a planner to plan to help decide what “needs” to be done each day. Be sure to include some of the things that you enjoy or want to do daily or weekly. Learn to rest and find your balance. Make time to be alone and enjoy the luxury of not being busy.

Rediscover something that you enjoyed doing years ago or during a time in your life when things were not as hectic for you. Discovering new hobbies or skills can be enjoyable and fulfill your areas of loneliness, boredom, and sadness. Hobbies don’t have to always involve shopping or spending money and I’ve found that when I give my time to others, I feel so much better about life and myself. This can also be a hobby and it makes the world a happier place.

We were all created for a purpose and we did not create ourselves. That’s hard for some people to accept, but I believe it with every ounce of blood in my veins. We have to spend time everyday reconnecting to the one that created us. Our creator, God can tell us how to fix ourselves and how to get positive energy and peace in our lives. The scripture, 2 Corinthians 4:16 reminds us that “our inner person is being renewed day by day.”

God is almighty and can do anything, but I do believe that sometimes he is waiting for us to ask for what we need. I challenge you to spend time reconnecting with God every day and ask him to refuel you and renew you and I guarantee you that he will show you how to renew yourself or you will begin to feel refueled and refreshed even on your toughest days.

When you’re busy in your career and especially if you are a parent that doesn’t have a ton of help or family to rely on, you may feel like there are not enough hours in the day to get essential things done. We’ve already talked about writing down and planning the things that need to get done, but what about the wants? Maybe you want to pray and meditate, workout, take a long uninterrupted shower, do your hair, or just watch your favorite tv show. As a parent, finding time in the still moments of a morning or when the children are asleep will be many of your best sure-fire ways to refuel yourself. Schedule your bedtime and your children’s bedtime to accommodate your needs. Most children don’t get enough sleep during the day, so try pushing their bedtime up 30 minutes to an hour. My mother’s rule for my brother and I as little kids was that we didn’t have to go to sleep if we weren’t sleepy, but at bedtime, we must lay in our beds and rest. I do this with my children now and I can assure you that they are normally asleep in 15-20 minutes after laying down quietly and peacefully. If your career calls for long hours or an unpredictable work schedule it is vitally important that you take small moments for yourself in the morning to revitalize yourself, or small moments at bedtime to decompress from your day.

Take care of yourself so that you can enjoy life and be able to pour into someone else when they need you the most.

Carmen ❤